Holding space for complexity

In addition to attending protests, calling my representatives, and having conversations with people I know, I've been publicly sharing my feelings about Palestine and Israel. While I stand firm in what I believe, my feelings around it are complex.

One thing that has been very helpful for me for understanding my own feelings, as well as opening dialogue for others who may feel differently than me, is something called dialectics.

What is a dialectic?

"A dialectic is when two seemingly conflicting things are true at the same time. You might also see dialectics when in conflict with other people. Being more dialectical can help to reduce the emotional intensity that comes from unbalanced, all-or-nothing thinking or conflicts with other people. It reminds us that there is more than one way to see a problem and people are unique and have different points of view." (Dr. Jillian Glasgow)

I wouldn't be able to do anti-oppression work without dialectics. Holding space for more than one thing to be true at the same time. Even if they seem to be conflicting. I've had several people question my values because I am Jewish AND I am opposed to apartheid and genocide in Gaza AND I value Palestinian lives just as much as I value Jewish lives. It's interpreted to somehow mean that I don't value Jewish lives enough. That I am not mourning the loss of Jewish life on 10/7 enough.

→Without dialectics, we can't see that destruction of Gaza doesn't make Jewish people any safer.

→Without dialectics, we can't acknowledge our collective grief and mourning and still want a ceasefire.

→Without dialectics, we can't allow for the horrors of current and historic antisemitism while also acknowledging that Israel's government is the oppressor.

→Without dialectics, we can't separate Hamas from Palestinians.

→Without dialectics, we can't acknowledge that anti-Blackness, antisemitism, and Islamophobia are alive and well in ALL spaces, and that we must ALL work tirelessly to eradicate ALL forms of oppression in order for any of us to be free.

Here are some things that I hold to be true:

✓I support the liberation of Palestine and

✓I am devastated by the loss of lives in Israel and

✓I am equally devastated by the loss of lives in Palestine and

✓I want all hostages to be released (in Palestine and Israel) and

✓I am Jewish and

✓I oppose Islamophobia and

✓I oppose antisemitism and

✓I believe that none of us are free until we are all free and

✓I oppose genocide and apartheid anywhere they exist and

✓I recognize that trauma is everywhere and impacts our thoughts, beliefs and behaviors in ways we might not expect and

✓I support the liberation and safety of all oppressed people even if they don't always agree with me and

✓The Nakba caused horrific trauma and displacement of an entire people and

✓Jewish people are historically and currently marginalized and

✓Muslim people are historically and currently marginalized and

✓Israel's government is an oppressor and

✓✓✓ This all breaks my heart.

ALL of these things can be true. And until we give ourselves the space to hold all of these truths, it will always feel like a zero-sum game, and we may never be able to recognize and honor each other's humanity.